Like a prancing unicorn proudly waving its erect staff in the diamond speckled rainbow colored sky, the alternative comedy-rock band Plecostomus radiates a shining beacon of light and hope penetrating the storm clouds of melodic mediocrity tenaciously gnawing on the world's musical nut sac.
According to legend, Plecostomus was formed in the fall of 2001 when a spermatozoa named Matt met an egg named Jimmy in the uterus known as Omaha , Nebraska . After surveying the monotonous and depressing state of music at the time, Pleco developed a revolutionary approach to song writing founded in catchy melodies and often politically incorrect lyrics laced with reckless wit and unabashed humor stemming from a combination of recreational stimulants and sexual frustration. They called their innovative idea “entertainment” which, when combined with a kick-ass live show, freed even the most prude breasts from the tyrannical grip of a filthy bra.
And so it was…
In early 2004, following two years of around-the-clock recording and masturbation, Plecostomus released their debut album Welcome to the Ple-ground. The 30 track, 80 minute masterpiece featured the college radio hit Conor, and the critical acclaim and vast wealth generated by the success of the album fueled speculation of Pleco's involvement in illegal weapons trafficking and organized crime.
With bank accounts overflowing and cocks sucked raw, Plecostomus was on top of the world. Tragically, following a brief stint as a member of the baroque supergroup "The Figs of Winter”, Pleco lost everything on a single roll of the die at Chief Snake Eye's Indian Casio and Resort in Atlantic City . Forced with no other option, Matt and Jimmy pawned their instruments for one final all-Asian sex tour, and spent the next three years living in a dumpster behind the world-renowned Omaha Airport Ramada Inn.
But all was not lost…
In 2007, after hitting it big on a lucky lotto scratch ticket, Plecostomus bought back their instruments and returned to the studio to record their sophomore album Society in General, which featured their second college radio hit Fat America. Other chartbusters such as The Poop Song and Roller Skating have since made their way to the top of internet playlists, and the accompanying animated music video for their song At the Renaissance has been hailed by online critics as “more liberating than two girls one cup”. In addition, Pleco's song The Sun was banned from radio airplay nationwide after one Iowa station received numerous complaints from someone at the FCC with a busted-off double jelly dong stuck up their ass. Such unanimous favor can only affirm that the light shining down upon Matt and Jimmy is brighter than ever, and Pleco has vowed to continue to make their way to the front of strip club lines across the country with testicles descended and meat fully erect.
Currently, Plecostomus is locked away in their secret underground lair laying down tracks foran EP and their long awaited third album, which is scheduled for release in April 2010. Sources close to the band indicate that the album will be “pretty good” and will most likely be recorded in English. When they aren't recording, Matt and Jimmy enjoy practicing for their next live show, sexing their concubines, and spending what little money they legally accrue from peddling their wares trying to impress people by informing them that Plecostomus sucks. |
